Some time ago, you made a post asking others who they want to be. You didn't know what your own answer would be at that point or didn't seem assured, in any case.
How do you feel now?
You're not ashamed of yourself, have qualities that are uniquely you - surely you've come to some conclusion on that matter.
[ he pauses. he remembers that post. it hadn't given him a clear cut answer back then. not that he expected much from the network. now, though. with all the discussions and changes . . . his answer feels clearer.
in a way, the thing that helped him break away from alex, who shattered the illusion of a false, perfect reality, that made him choose . . . was himself. his own self. ]
I won't say it's the only thing that matters. But I've realized that the one line I won't cross is giving up who I am. Maybe the what or the shape of it doesn't match up to anyone else in the world. Maybe it never will.
That's fine. Even if I'm the only one, I'll hold onto myself.
[ in a weird way, dolph does believe that. their paths are divergent now, with dolph at the end of his journey, but also at the beginning of one while akechi still has his goal to reach.
[There's a degree of discomfort in the realization Dolph knows more than most when it comes to a person's true self being separate from an image. Fury burns hot in his chest. It tempers to an ember moments later.
They've discussed this. It's nothing outside of the norm. All Akechi has to do is pretend he gives a shit about something and Dolph will be appeased. It's not as if he knows what Akechi's capable of, what he'll do or the life he's living in the shadow of perfection.]
If that's your wish, I'll indulge it.
You may be disappointed in the outcome. I'm an open book - there's little you haven't seen and less hidden that you couldn't glean. I'm only a normal teenager after all.
[There's a pause. Akechi is typing. Backspaces and-]
However, if it's someone's true self you wish to hold onto, I would rather share a different tale with you.
Everyone knows The Detective Prince in my reality. I'm a common household name. My memory will be preserved with that alone for the time fame is afforded to me.
[His mother-
There's a longer, distinct pause. It lasts a minute, then two and-]
If you're willing, I would like to go to the bathhouse with you sometime.
Akechi sure is at the bathhouse, towel around waist and all. Content as can be!!! It's a day ending y which means he's ready for a scalding hot bath. Let's fucking GO.]
That's fine, of course. Coming out here on such short notice is enough to be grateful for.
[The bath? Sure is an open, huge bathhouse. Steaming hot water, foggy room, humid atmosphere - follow him into the great beyond Dolph. Akechi slides into that ridiculously hot water and waits for his companion to come in with him. PSPSPSPSPS.]
Besides, I often beat everyone I take a bath with. Not to brag, but I can stay in here for hours without the heat bothering me.
[ he eyes the water with some temerity before sighing and sliding in. he's careful to keep his metal arm braced on the top. otherwise this would be a very uncomfortable experience for him. ]
It's bizarre. It's not the first or second time he's spoken about this topic in a bathhouse, even if only one party remembers.
It makes his stomach churn regardless. The water helps. ]
While I enjoy bathhouses in my own world, it's uncommon for me to have time to visit in my reality. You understand why, so I don't need to go into details on it.
But it wasn't always that way. When I was younger, I spent a great deal of time there. Hours a night for many years. My mother would drop me off prior to her work and then pick me up before the baths would close. It's how I gained such a tolerance for this type of heat.
[ ah, so that's it. he had wondered why and maruki's reaction hadn't clarified it. a familiar place. he can see the appeal.
his own mother's work was . . . well. a difficult topic, if true. she was a sex worker. dolph didn't remember any of it, but he was so young anyway. if he held an impression, it was stamped out long ago. ]
[The water's hotter than ever - he's grateful for it.]
She was though. At the time, I didn't realize how much. Looking back on it - I recall moments where she seemed to be overwhelmed from the world. She had no friends, no husband, no allies, no family outside of a child vying for her constant attention. Her job as a sex worker caused us both to be ostracized. Few would speak to her, less would help her.
Eventually, she took her own life.
[A body hanging from a rafter - ten splinters from a tightly wound rope. A knocked over chair under dangling feet, a cold blue tinted corpse hovering.]
I'm not saying this for pity. I don't want it. I've long since gotten over what happened, but-
[It's the whole point they're here.]
When you asked for a truth about me, there's one very few know. Her life was scrubbed from mine for the sake of my image. A 'Detective Prince' could never form for someone with such a background normally. To my fans, coworkers and classmates - she's a nameless entity that died when I was young and that's all.
[ dolph starts, a strangled sound escaping his throat. obviously, he and akechi shared an absurd amount of parallels. none of that is surprising at this stage, but this one was — dolph couldn't hide his reaction at all. ]
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Which reminds me -
Some time ago, you made a post asking others who they want to be. You didn't know what your own answer would be at that point or didn't seem assured, in any case.
How do you feel now?
You're not ashamed of yourself, have qualities that are uniquely you - surely you've come to some conclusion on that matter.
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in a way, the thing that helped him break away from alex, who shattered the illusion of a false, perfect reality, that made him choose . . . was himself. his own self. ]
I won't say it's the only thing that matters. But I've realized that the one line I won't cross is giving up who I am. Maybe the what or the shape of it doesn't match up to anyone else in the world. Maybe it never will.
That's fine. Even if I'm the only one, I'll hold onto myself.
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I certainly hope you're able to maintain that for the rest of your days.
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but it makes him wonder. ]
Can I make a request?
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Can you . . . share a little of your true self with me?
I want to hold onto it.
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They've discussed this. It's nothing outside of the norm. All Akechi has to do is pretend he gives a shit about something and Dolph will be appeased. It's not as if he knows what Akechi's capable of, what he'll do or the life he's living in the shadow of perfection.]
If that's your wish, I'll indulge it.
You may be disappointed in the outcome. I'm an open book - there's little you haven't seen and less hidden that you couldn't glean. I'm only a normal teenager after all.
[There's a pause. Akechi is typing. Backspaces and-]
However, if it's someone's true self you wish to hold onto, I would rather share a different tale with you.
Everyone knows The Detective Prince in my reality. I'm a common household name. My memory will be preserved with that alone for the time fame is afforded to me.
[His mother-
There's a longer, distinct pause. It lasts a minute, then two and-]
If you're willing, I would like to go to the bathhouse with you sometime.
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[ these thoughts do not connect. a serious discussion . . . while naked???? ]
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You asked for this discussion, didn't you?
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Anyway. I'll be there.
text - > action
[And lo and behold-
Akechi sure is at the bathhouse, towel around waist and all. Content as can be!!! It's a day ending y which means he's ready for a scalding hot bath. Let's fucking GO.]
There you are - have you ever been here before?
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[ this is . . . very jarring. thankfully, maruki explained but dolph can't see how this is comfortable. ]
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[It's great. Follow him to the lava water - which is where Akechi guides him to.]
I hope you can handle the heat.
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It should be fine. Though I may not be able to stay long.
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[The bath? Sure is an open, huge bathhouse. Steaming hot water, foggy room, humid atmosphere - follow him into the great beyond Dolph. Akechi slides into that ridiculously hot water and waits for his companion to come in with him. PSPSPSPSPS.]
Besides, I often beat everyone I take a bath with. Not to brag, but I can stay in here for hours without the heat bothering me.
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Pretty sure that's still a brag.
The metal makes it hard, that's all.
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Will it ruin your body if you stay here? I would hate for you to rust.
[Is that what happens????]
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But metal gets hot, no matter what kind it is. And I'm still made of flesh for the most part. It's just an uncomfortable combination.
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[And now that Dolph's here-
It's bizarre. It's not the first or second time he's spoken about this topic in a bathhouse, even if only one party remembers.
It makes his stomach churn regardless. The water helps. ]
While I enjoy bathhouses in my own world, it's uncommon for me to have time to visit in my reality. You understand why, so I don't need to go into details on it.
But it wasn't always that way. When I was younger, I spent a great deal of time there. Hours a night for many years. My mother would drop me off prior to her work and then pick me up before the baths would close. It's how I gained such a tolerance for this type of heat.
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his own mother's work was . . . well. a difficult topic, if true. she was a sex worker. dolph didn't remember any of it, but he was so young anyway. if he held an impression, it was stamped out long ago. ]
There are worse places to be.
I take it you didn't have much, back then.
cw: suicide
[The water's hotter than ever - he's grateful for it.]
She was though. At the time, I didn't realize how much. Looking back on it - I recall moments where she seemed to be overwhelmed from the world. She had no friends, no husband, no allies, no family outside of a child vying for her constant attention. Her job as a sex worker caused us both to be ostracized. Few would speak to her, less would help her.
Eventually, she took her own life.
[A body hanging from a rafter - ten splinters from a tightly wound rope. A knocked over chair under dangling feet, a cold blue tinted corpse hovering.]
I'm not saying this for pity. I don't want it. I've long since gotten over what happened, but-
[It's the whole point they're here.]
When you asked for a truth about me, there's one very few know. Her life was scrubbed from mine for the sake of my image. A 'Detective Prince' could never form for someone with such a background normally. To my fans, coworkers and classmates - she's a nameless entity that died when I was young and that's all.
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She — She was a sex worker?
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His expression remains neutral despite it. Feigned. Tense.]
Yes, she was. Is that a problem?
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cw: suicide
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canon doesnt give it but he would know <3
better than sexyleggygoddess69 at least
SCREAMFJDSOPJG
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cw: violent thoughts
wrapppps?