[ for some reason, that loosens the knot in his chest. for a long time, he felt like an outsider among the others. not part of their world. their shared experiences. he never felt he could fully bridge that gap, no matter how kindly they let him in, how real it was.
but. it was always real. he was always a part of levi's life. dolph knew about the time he met erwin. his life with his mother. his struggle. even their brief sorrow over finnick, they shared together. dolph gave him tips for his shop.
levi . . . really and truly loved him and dolph . . . had loved him too.
[ He isn't sure what he says that makes Dolph grip him tighter, but Jean responds by squeezing Dolph back. He lifts his head to press a kiss to Dolph's cheek, his forehead just a touch out of reach while they're standing.
Dolph was loved by Levi. He can only hope Dolph understands that. There's a reason Jean had asked him to be at their wedding, and it wasn't only for Jean's sake. ]
[ Jean keeps his arms wrapped abound Dolph. There's no way to know for sure, and the one time he's lied to someone here (Eren) it went so catastrophically bad for so long. He doesn't make a habit of it even now. ]
It doesn't change that it happened, though. He was a better person because of you too.
[ was he? this is the hard thing. this is how people live. believing. hoping. dolph cut that off for so long. now, with alex behind him and a better world existing, he has to do better. ]
[ he hopes so. it's ironic that he struggles to allow himself that leeway but always allowing others whatever space they need. but dolph always fears what he is, what space he's allowed.
but he's here. he exists. maybe now he can push a bit further. ]
[ Jean leans against Dolph again, letting their conversation go quiet. Eventually he'll suggest getting up to eat, or maybe taking a swim, but for now he's content to not push Dolph. To not be okay together. ]
[ dolph continues to run his fingers through jean's hair, letting the quiet talk for them. they're not alone and in a way, even levi will live through them. ]
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but. it was always real. he was always a part of levi's life. dolph knew about the time he met erwin. his life with his mother. his struggle. even their brief sorrow over finnick, they shared together. dolph gave him tips for his shop.
levi . . . really and truly loved him and dolph . . . had loved him too.
his eye stings. he grips jean tighter. ]
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Dolph was loved by Levi. He can only hope Dolph understands that. There's a reason Jean had asked him to be at their wedding, and it wasn't only for Jean's sake. ]
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but. he'll try. ]
Yeah. Maybe.
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It doesn't change that it happened, though. He was a better person because of you too.
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I'll try to believe that. And make it real.
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[ Jean smiles a little, knowing what it's like. But it goes unsaid: he'll be here for Dolph anyways. ]
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[ no more just taking steps. he has to work harder. on himself. for the people he loves. ]
But I won't give up on it.
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If you practice it long enough, you start really believing it anyway.
.... Granted, he was talking about propaganda, but I think it still stands.
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Great example.
But I get what you mean.
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[ He bumps his nose against Dolph's jaw in apology. ]
It's something to try, anyways. And if it doesn't work, that's okay.
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but he's here. he exists. maybe now he can push a bit further. ]
Yeah. I'll keep trying.
good wrap point?
yep sounds good <3