[ Jean has mostly kept his hands to himself, for the most part. When Dolph says that, he reaches out, a hand landing on his shoulder and squeezing. ]
I won't lie and say some people do want something. But I'm not lying when I say I'm not looking for anything. The only thing I'm taking is some of your time, if you want to put it like that.
[ He offers a little smile. ]
You are fun. I like talking to you, I like learning about you and where you're from, even if it's shitty.
[ the touch startles him, eye wide. can that really be true? dolph searches his face but he's no good at telling. even with sarah and alex, he just didn't know.
no, that's not quite right. even now he wants to believe. he wants to care. he's not ready to give that up completely. ]
[ He gives Dolph a wider smile for agreeing to it. He can't help but wonder how bad it's gotten where Dolph is from, if he can't even accept something like this.
Not that their world was much better, after a point. ]
There's plenty of things I want to be selfish about - my partners, for one. My friends here, I want them to be safe. People like Erwin and Levi, I want them to ... be happy.
[ He doesn't say 'have a chance to stay together', he doesn't know if Dolph knows that Erwin dies in the future and he doesn't want to spread that around. ]
Getting to know new friends here, spending time with them - that's what I want to be selfish about too. It feels like I've been nothing but selfish.
Is it? It's the kind of thing I've never had a chance to be selfish about. I'd dedicated my heart to humanity - it doesn't leave a lot of time for other things.
Oh, I tried. But all the time I spent with my mother and friends was on a timer - I'd have to go back and fight again. Here...
[ He sighs. ]
Here, there's barely any danger. Most of it is what we place ourselves in the line of if we're acting foolishly. I know that there's monsters that show up, but even those monsters don't compare to the ones at home.
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I won't lie and say some people do want something. But I'm not lying when I say I'm not looking for anything. The only thing I'm taking is some of your time, if you want to put it like that.
[ He offers a little smile. ]
You are fun. I like talking to you, I like learning about you and where you're from, even if it's shitty.
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no, that's not quite right. even now he wants to believe. he wants to care. he's not ready to give that up completely. ]
Then . . . you can have it.
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[ He gives Dolph a wider smile for agreeing to it. He can't help but wonder how bad it's gotten where Dolph is from, if he can't even accept something like this.
Not that their world was much better, after a point. ]
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There's nothing else you want to be selfish about?
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[ He doesn't say 'have a chance to stay together', he doesn't know if Dolph knows that Erwin dies in the future and he doesn't want to spread that around. ]
Getting to know new friends here, spending time with them - that's what I want to be selfish about too. It feels like I've been nothing but selfish.
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I'm pretty sure that's just . . . normal.
me crying i'm sorry dolph he's just stupid and new to poly
im crying
The thing about humanity is . . . you have to let yourself be part of it.
Otherwise, there's no point. For you or for them.
holds jean in my hands this shingeki is so stupid
[ He sighs. ]
Here, there's barely any danger. Most of it is what we place ourselves in the line of if we're acting foolishly. I know that there's monsters that show up, but even those monsters don't compare to the ones at home.
Being able to let my guard down is different.
bless,,,
You deserve a chance to live.
We all do. We all . . . deserve that.
at least he achieved it in the other thread
[ He leans over to nudge Dolph a little with his arm, smiling. ]
he did, I'm proud!!
Both of us. It's what I fought for. I wanted my humanity back.